Free eBooks The Emotionally Absent Mother: A Guide To Self-Healing And Getting The Love You Missed Available To Downloads
Was your mother too busy, too tired, or too checked-out to provide you with the nurturing you needed as a child? Men and women who were “undermothered” as children often struggle with intimate relationships, in part because of their unmet need for maternal care. The Emotionally Absent Mother will help you understand what was missing from your childhood, how this relates to your mother’s own history, and how you can fill the “mother gap” by: Examining the past with compassion for yourself and your mother Finding the child inside of you and learning to mother yourself Opening to the archetype of the Good Mother Allowing friends and loved ones to provide support, guidance, and other elements of good mothering that you missed Through reflections, exercises, and clear explanations, psychotherapist Jasmin Lee Cori helps adult sons and daughters heal the wounds left by mothers who failed to provide the essential ingredients that every child needs. She traces perceived personal “defects” back to mothering deficits, relieving self-blame. And, by teaching today’s undermothered adults to cultivate the mothering they missed, she helps them secure a happier future—for themselves and their children.
Paperback: 244 pages
Publisher: Experiment, The; 3rd Edition edition (September 7, 2010)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1615190287
ISBN-13: 978-1615190287
Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.6 x 8.2 inches
Shipping Weight: 9.1 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars See all reviews (168 customer reviews)
Best Sellers Rank: #10,720 in Books (See Top 100 in Books) #11 in Books > Parenting & Relationships > Family Relationships > Parent & Adult Child #11 in Books > Parenting & Relationships > Family Relationships > Dysfunctional Families #24 in Books > Health, Fitness & Dieting > Psychology & Counseling > Psychotherapy, TA & NLP
I have always carried with me the feeling that I grew up without a mother, even though I had a mother. My mother was physically present (she even stayed at home and did not work most of the years of my childhood) and certainly not a malicious person by any stretch of the imagination. So this was a crazy feeling to carry around with me as an adult. This book confirmed for me that I am in fact not crazy to feel this way, and explained very clearly how and why many daughters enter adulthood with the feeling of being motherless or under-mothered, how this affects them in their adult life, and finally gives very practical advice for how to recover.This books is clear, well-written, nuanced, and organized. In chapter two, The Many Faces of the Good Mother, it provides a clear, balanced picture of what it looks like when a mother is meeting her child's needs fully (not perfectly!). Other recovery books have helped me to see that abandonment and neglect exist on a spectrum (i.e. just because you weren't left as a baby on someone's doorstep doesn't mean you weren't abandoned on some level as a child). This book helped me to refine my understanding even further and hone in on the specific holes that I experienced in my relationship with my mother--holes that are still affecting how I function as an adult, and how I function as a mother myself. It isn't about blame or resentment, but about having clarity and taking responsibility for your needs so that you can move on. The book is very affirming in telling the reader: if it is still bothering you, then it is still bothering you. It's not over and done with until you feel finished with it. This book is written to help you move on so that you can think about other things.
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