Free eBooks 1001 Funniest Things Ever Said Available To Downloads
Now in paperback! Here are a thousand and one laugh-out-loud quotes, quips, and jokes, all in one packed-to-the-brim volume. Yes, folks, sit back and enjoy this collection of inadvertent gaffes, thigh-slappers, puns, and everything and anything else that'll tickle your funny bone. There's something old, something new, something stolen, and something blue―from favorite comedians, sports and political figures, and literary wits. There are even giggles for the kids and groaners for the grown-ups. Just a few among the 1,001 funniest things ever said:“I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.”―Rita Rudner“I don't know if it's good for baseball, but it sure beats the hell out of rooming with Phil Rizzuto.”―Yogi Berra on being told that Joe DiMaggio was to marry Marilyn Monroe“I made my money the old-fashioned way. I was very nice to a wealthy relative right before he died.”―Malcolm Forbes “The Dalai Lama visited the White House and told the President that he could teach him to find a higher state of consciousness. Then, after talking to Bush for a few minutes, he said, ‘You know what? Let's just grab lunch.'”―Bill Maher
Series: 1001
Paperback: 352 pages
Publisher: Lyons Press; 1 edition (April 1, 2010)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1599211955
ISBN-13: 978-1599211954
Product Dimensions: 6.1 x 0.9 x 6.9 inches
Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars See all reviews (32 customer reviews)
Best Sellers Rank: #278,084 in Books (See Top 100 in Books) #33 in Books > Reference > Encyclopedias & Subject Guides > Humor #242 in Books > Reference > Quotations #533 in Books > Reference > Dictionaries & Thesauruses > Dictionaries
Book review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.I was skeptical of this book when I first selected it -- only because what appears funny to one person often is not funny to me. At least that has been my experience. As I read more and more of the book, I kept thinking that the statements (not all jokes per se) selected were great. I even laughed out loud at some of them.So, as a test of my perceptions, I gave the book to my father-in-law, Edgar E. Willis. For those reading this who are unfamiliar with that name, he is the author of that great book on humor entitled, How to be Funny on Purpose: Creating and Consuming Humor. His book is available at .com.As an author of a book on humor, as a critical analyst of humor in the contemporary world as well as what it takes to be funny, as a teacher of how to construct jokes, as a lecturer on the art of humor, and as a true connoisseur of quality humor, I thought his reaction to the selections in 1001 Funniest Things Ever Said would be a true gauge of the book's merits.I was correct. He not only read the book from cover-to-cover, he wanted to have it for an extended amount of time. Also, with a question on a quotation from Dan Quayle (which he had used as an example in his own book), I even took the time to Google it and get a complete explanation. (It was a quotation attributed to him that probably was never said by him.)All the way through the book, both Edgar and I came up with the same question: How in the world did someone discover all of this great material?Although the book is 322 pages long, it is only 6-inches by 7-inches, and there are usually only 3 or 4 entries on a page; thus, it is a quick read.
This is my second book by Steven Price,and I have become a big fan of his.The other book,"1001 Insults,Put-Downs & Comebacks" blew me away.See my review on October 8,2007. There are a huge number of books on humor;simply because if it weren't for humor,I believe we would all go mad.There are many forms that humor takes;but my favorite is the one-liner, that often shows up in Quotation Books.The thing that really adds to the humor in a quote,is knowing who said it,intentionally or unintentionally. This is a rather small book in size but with over 322 pages is loaded with some of the best humor you'll ever find between two covers. It is obvious that Price has picked some of ,if not the best quotes,from many,many personalities over the years and from all walks of life. He has organized the book into 11 subject or character types,which is a good way to do it.Also,he gives a complete index,so that you can find the quotes by those who said them,or simply look through the index ,spot a name ,and look for their funniest quote.I found this fun;because there are mny names that one doesn't readily associate with humor;such as Abe Lincoln or General George Patton,or when you see a name of someone who is known for their humor;you wonder what would be chosen for their funniest line. Here is a sample of what you'll find in this tome. How's this,for something funny from Nikita Khrushchev? "The main difference for the history of the world if I had been shot instead of Kennedy,is that Onassis probably wouldn't have married Mrs.Krushchev" Or;from that great Irish Wit,Brendan Behan; "Other people have a Nationality.The Irish and the Jews have a Phychosis." Mickey Mantel,funny?? "I hated to bat against Don Drysdale.
This is a very good book of funny quotes by famous people and entertainers. I am sure some of them you will have already heard before, when you start reading this book. The book is very well organized by the joke tellers, e.g.-professional comedians, Hollywood actors and actresses, sports figures, kids jokes, knock knock jokes, children's jokes and jokes about foreigners. If you give it a chance it will have you in stitches.It is important before you read this book to check your ego at the door. If you can't do that, then, I would suggest you not buy this book. If you can leave your existing bias outside your reading room, you will be up late at night reading this until you can't keep your eyes open anymore. I am sure future reviewers of this book will reconfirm thisMy only criticism is that I had a friend who when I told her some of the jokes about foreigners, she was offended at some of the jokes. Some of her observations might hold some weight, but I think she should have tried to just appreciate the humor and not insert her own biases when I told her those jokes. I found some of the children's jokes at times a bit hard to understand, probably because I had a bit of a "jilted" childhood. The alphabetical index in the back was fun to use to browse, when you want to break away from the way the book's jokes are arranged in their order.There was one whole Prairie Home Companion Joke Show that sounded like they had used this book's jokes as its basis. Even if all you do is buy this book to tell a joke to your wife before you go to bed, it is worth the buy. It might not save your marriage, but you're both a lot more likely to remain friends during the divorce if you covertly use it on your spouse occasionally, just before, during and after the proceedings.
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