Free eBooks Separated By Duty, United In Love (revised): Guide To Long Distance Relationships For Military Couples (Updated) Available To Downloads
Where Can You Turn. . .?. . .when the bills are due, the kids are acting out, loneliness and doubt are creeping into your quiet hours--and you're handling it all alone? If your partner is in the military, these challenges may be the greatest that your relationship will ever face. Now is the time you need answers, resources, and understanding. This is the book that will give them to you. Military wife and U.S. Army veteran Shellie Vandevoorde has penned a practical, compassionate guide to help military couples cope with the separation of active deployment. Now updated and expanded, Separated by Duty, United in Love is infused with her years of experience, offering sound and comforting advice from someone who's been there. Vandevoorde explores real-life issues and shares invaluable insights on the best ways to: • Keep the lines of communication open while your partner is away • Address your children's fears as you cope with your own • Juggle finances and other household duties • Find the balance you desperately need • Cope with post-traumatic stress, injury and other challenges when a spouse returns from war • Utilize military resources and support groups to help yourself through the toughest times You are not alone. Separated by Duty, United in Love gives you the tools and the encouragement you need to help your military relationship survive--and thrive.
Paperback: 224 pages
Publisher: Citadel; Updated edition (May 1, 2010)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0806531991
ISBN-13: 978-0806531991
Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.7 x 8.2 inches
Shipping Weight: 8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars See all reviews (64 customer reviews)
Best Sellers Rank: #317,615 in Books (See Top 100 in Books) #45 in Books > Parenting & Relationships > Family Relationships > Military Families #1639 in Books > Parenting & Relationships > Marriage & Adult Relationships #5857 in Books > Self-Help > Relationships
The assumption that a service member's spouse is a wife was rampent throughout this book, and it got rather tiresome (especially for an Air Force husband of more than a decade).Most of the advice was sound and well written, but very basic. She gives good advice, but most of the advice would benefit from a more detailed 'further reading' section, especially the parts about dealing with money and suspected infidelity. Despite this shortcoming, this is an excellent book for a new military spouse.Regardless of disclaimers, the book was clearly written for military wives, not military spouses. What irks my wife, an active duty Air Force officer is the assumption that husbands don't need help, and are OK when the wife is away. What irks me is the implication that women shouldn't be in the military. To assume that the spouse is a wife is to assume that only men are in uniform. And by not making it clear that military husbands have most of the same challenges as the wives plus a few distinct ones, the statement is that men shouldn't be the ones on the home front. During my own military career, the female officers that I served with were, on the average, more competent than the males (although there were two or three that really tried to pull the rest down). It is not appropriate to send a message that these women serving our country in uniform shouldn't be there or shouldn't have husbands.This one was good for new wives, but really struck a nerve for me.E. M. Van Court
This book looked great online. But when I went to a local store to take a look before buying it, I was very disappointed. The quality of the printing - particularly the paper - was absolutely terrible. On top of that, the book doesn't offer any special insights - it doesn't cover any new ground, have any sort of scientific basis, or otherwise distinguish itself. There are plenty of websites out there for military spouses where you can get the exact same information for FREE. The military has better resources for you and won't charge you for them, and they actually have some credible sources behind it. Don't waste your money on this book.
Thousands of military families are separated by military deployment at any given time, and this book should be given to each and every family. It is easy to read, and it is chocked full of heartfelt, excellent advice to deal with many of the larger and smaller issues that are frequently a part of being separated by duty. This book has thoughtful insight into the daily challenges that face military couples during a deployment. There are so many topics covered in this book that I am sure are almost never addressed with military couples. Most of the couples I have known just struggle the best they can through deployments, hoping just to get through it, to be emotionally and financially intact at the end of it all, with the loved one safely back at home. This book offers a better way to guide your relationship and family through a military deployment. It offers much needed encouragement and advice from military wives and husbands who have experienced being apart in the military. I would have never even thought of many of the excellent topics it covers, a few of which are emotional issues, financial problems, childrearing issues and most importantly, understanding and nurturing yourself and each other while you are apart and when you reunited. "Separated by Duty, United in Love" is a real life commentary on very real situations that present themselves daily on the homefront in the military deployment experience. Reading this book may be the most important thing you do to nurture your relationship and family during this challenging time.
I bought this book because a friend of mine had it and mentioned how she loved it. Although the first chapter was decent, the rest of the book fell short of my hopeful expectations. She has no sources behind her advice so what you're getting is just a bunch of advice from random women with no other qualifications but military spouse. I never finished the book because I found more and more that her views about marriage were very different from mine. At one point she suggests that wives could send her hubby off to deployment with an adult magazine "to help their marriage." I don't agree with that and could not continue reading a book that supports what I do not. It seems like lousy marriage advice to me.
I was hoping this book would actually address coping issues; instead, it basically relays the message of "You don't understand what's going on over there, keep busy, and support your solider no matter what." Not bad advice, of course, but I didn't need a book to tell me that. There's no additional insight in these pages that you haven't already heard. It's also 90% advice for married couples with children. And it's just that: anecdotal advice. Not an entertaining or challenging read.
Back when DOMA was still in affect, this book was only semi-useful, but now after the repeal, this book is a great guide for couples in the military. It really goes over the different things one can expect, from the more secretive jobs and the stress of a deployment. It also goes over budgeting and managing distance. It also goes over the more unpleasant things such as what to do when an affair has occurred and etc.it's a good guide to help get through depression, to look for support groups, and really manage a family. I think this book should be read by soldiers and their spouses alike.
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