Free eBooks A Career Girl's Guide To Becoming A Stepmom: Expert Advice From Other Stepmoms On How To Juggle Your Job, Your Marriage, And Your New Stepkids Available To Downloads
You have an exciting, fulfilling job. You've fallen in love with the man of your dreams—and met his three kids! Now what? Jacquelyn B. Fletcher shows how any professional woman turned wife and instant stepmother can build on the skills she employs at work—organization, team-building, goal-setting, and planning—to succeed at home in her new role as stepmom. Drawing on the latest research, her own experiences, and those of other real-life stepmothers, Fletcher offers advice, hope, encouragement, and much-needed answers to common conundrums, including:Why don't I have control over my own schedule?What kind of relationship do I want with my stepkids?What if I want to have a baby of my own?How do we create a budget that feels fair if I make more money than my husband does?A Career Girl's Guide to Becoming a Stepmom is essential reading for the professional woman who has it all—and then suddenly has more than she expected.
File Size: 227 KB
Print Length: 354 pages
Page Numbers Source ISBN: 0060846836
Publisher: HarperCollins e-books (October 13, 2009)
Publication Date: October 13, 2009
Sold by: Digital Services LLC
Language: English
ASIN: B000QUCO1M
Text-to-Speech: Enabled
X-Ray: Not Enabled
Word Wise: Enabled
Lending: Not Enabled
Enhanced Typesetting: Not Enabled
Best Sellers Rank: #533,582 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store) #58 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Nonfiction > Parenting & Relationships > Family Relationships > Stepparenting & Blended Families #131 in Books > Parenting & Relationships > Family Relationships > Stepparenting & Blended Families #633 in Books > Parenting & Relationships > Parenting > Parenting Girls
This past fall I married a man with 2 children from a previous marriage - hence entering the world of stepmotherhood. I never ever thought I'd be here. I had spent the better majority of my life working hard to further my career and continue to find that part of my life both rewarding and very fulfilling. I knew likely I would marry - I had great interest in the companionship and lifelong partnership that would bring. But I have never had quite the same desire to be a mom, let alone a stepmom. Life has a funny way of interjecting an alternate path when you least expect it!Since I met the kids almost 4 years ago, and knowing my relationship with their father was going to be serious, I started searching for support help and doing a lot of reading. But so much out there just never felt like it fit me...negativity, horror stories, or just basic differences - like me not bringing any kids into the equation on my side. I felt like the odd man out, and often felt more alien to stepmotherhood (or the possibility of it) than before I started reading. It is an ongoing "battle" for me. There are some days where I feel very confident in my role as stepmom. There are other days (many more than I would like to admit) where I feel out of sorts and paralyzed almost by the two kids running through my house.But with this book my feelings were very different. I found myself affirming some of the lines with noticeable head nods and even outloud comments like "I'm not the only one" and "I knew it wasn't just me." It was great. It was like finding a positive, comforting and empathetic friend who spoke with candor and honesty but also with heart and passion for making stepmotherhood more welcoming, more understood, and most importantly, more valued than it often is.
Over the last six months, I have bought and read six or seven books on being a stepmother. This is one of the better books but my complaint about all of them, including this one, is that they all assume a stepmother is going to step into the role of a "mother" who is responsible for "chores" associated with the kids. I deliberately chose not to have children but I now am involved with a man with two kids and am at a crossroads to decide whether to make a long term commitment to him and his kids. One of my biggest hesitations is whether I can be a stepmother, with all its responsibilities and heartache. The books all have helped to inform me as to what the expectations are for a stepmother. It seems like the books all assume (expect) a stepmother has to cook for, clean up after, discipline, carpool, etc. the stepkids. All the books I have read deal with these situations and help to solve problems associated with this type of stepmother role. I wish, though, that the books, including this one, would provide alternative situations and roles for stepmothers. We have trouble finding our way and some options would be helpful. Perhaps I am unrealistic and "the most wicked of wicked" stepmothers to suggest this, but, for example, what would be wrong with the stepmother being emotionally available to the stepkids but not taking any responsibility for the "motherhood" chores, such as cleaning, dishes, etc. and also carving out significant space and time for herself? After all, they are not our kids as we are reminded of daily. These responsibilities are the fathers. (Chapters 2 and 10 address these issues somewhat.
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